Simply Tuesday and me

From Simply Tuesday, by Emily P. Freeman:

"If the Way is a person, I have to admit it isn't me."

"I want answers. Christ gives me himself..."

"Faith doesn't mean waiting for understanding or clarity. Faith means trusting God in the midst of misunderstanding and lack of clarity."

"I've learned what it means to let go of the try-hard life. But daily, I still need to learn to let go of life. I don't live with life that comes from me, but with the life of Christ within me."

"I confess how disappointed I am that I don't have clarity. But in the confession, I begin to see Christ. I begin to release my obsession with building my life into something linear, something I can figure out."

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I have been fighting with my own bare hands for the last year, maybe more. I've been desperately grasping at any and every opportunity to leave behind something that God isn't ready for me to leave behind. It has not been a fun experience, this waiting and wondering and feeling forgotten.

God has a way of whispering - echoing, as Margaret Feinberg says - until my ears open. Through divine encounters, books, and a new life map study I'm doing with other women, I'm hearing the same thing: Stop trying. Stop fighting me.

I don't love giving up control of my life, but the irony is that I'm so much happier when I do. When will I ever learn?

It's easier to trust God with my present when I remind myself of my past. God has faithfully held my hand and walked me through every confusing or difficult time. Sometimes we make it through the tunnel and see the reason. Sometimes the reason is still elusive. The point is, we made it.

"If the Way is a person, I have to admit it isn't me."